Below are responses to some of the more brief and obscure (spam, irrelevant, facetious etc.) questions we have received at Hat HQ this week:
Does the guy I like like me as well?
Mylei, Melbourne VIC
Well if his tongue is down your throat and his hand is on your rump, then yes, chances are he does like you.
What should I do this long weekend? Make a chicken shepherd’s pie or go out and party?
Donna, Melbourne VIC
You can have your pie and eat it too. Have a hearty meal then head out; as my guess is you won’t be eating until Tuesday.
I have really huge balls. They smell like cheese. Blue cheese. How do I clean them?
Huge Balls, Brisbane QLD
You might be better contacting Dolly Doctor about that. Good luck with your dairy issues.
Almighty hat, why does it sting when I pee?
Josh, Facebook THE INTERNET
Perhaps you should speak to your physician. I am not equipped to deal with your equipment. Or perhaps speak to Huge Balls above. You two seem to have a lot in common.
Published on 5 June 2009 by Agony Uncle