The next time you consider hosting a ten-course meat-only banquet peppered with palette cleansing on the defibrillator, cast a thought to your invitation stationery. J&D (Justin Esch and Dave Lefow) on their quest to ensure that “everything tastes like bacon” have invented the Mmmvelope – a bacon-flavoured envelope that promises to tantalise the tastebuds with the synthetic porcine goodness that only novelty envelopes can. Sure, the idea is entirely hideous, un-PC and Peta-unfriendly, but if you were any of the above you wouldn’t be on this site, now would you?

Now, if you need more convincing that bacon is better than true love, speak to the folk at The Oatmeal because quite frankly, you’re looking at a man who’s a sandwich away from an eating disorder … in a good way.

I do believe there’s more for you to read: