Dear Agony Uncle,

I was recently on a date and at the conclusion of the meal, he pulled out a Shop-A-Docket coupon to pay for the bill. I was quite shocked, and although he didn’t do anything wrong per se, in doing so he indicated that he would always be frugal if we were to continue a relationship. Am I a snob or is there something wrong with this?

Shop-A-Flop, Brisbane

Dear Shop-A-Flop,

Recently, I went on a date in Paris with some hotshot finance type who proceeded to text me as I caught the Métro on the trip that I had perfectly timed to take me from Jules Joffrin to Trocadéro. “Be on time, not like those Aussies” was the first message I received that riled me to the core, for I am rarely late and although terrible at maths, a master at the 24-hour clock. A subsequent text came through, “Are you a fan of IRR/multiple calculations in private equity?” I was puzzled. What did that have to do with the price of fish in the Czech Republic?

When I finally arrived and after a quick Wikipedia check to learn that ‘IRR’ stands for ‘internal rate of return’, some capital finance jargon whose definition ceases to stick with me, things went from bad to worse. Sure, we had the best table at Café de L’Homme with magnificent Eiffel Tower views eclipsed only by the ridiculously good-looking wait staff. Yes, I might have consumed some of the best foie gras I’ve ever tasted and a salmon fillet so tender angel’s wept with every bite. Yet it was when not one, but two mobile phones appeared on the table and hotshot finance type proceeded to take calls from both in between standing up between courses (when I hadn’t even finished mine) and smoking Marlboro Reds out on the terrace, that I realised that despite all the finery, my time was more valuable. I mean, who are you? President Sarkozy? What kind of gall did this Gaul have?

What I’m trying to say is that even though I have been on all manner of dodgy dates, not a single one has ever concluded in a budget bill splitting, but it’s not necessarily the end of the world. Although it’s something that should have been saved for when you know each other a little better, his frugal nature mightn’t suggest that he is in fact cheap. Take my situation, for example: sure the cheque might have been picked up, but what’s the cost of humiliation? You can look at it two ways: if things pan out well, you could either end up with a cubic zirconia or the Hope diamond. Is it worth taking the risk? Nothing ventured, nothing gained, I say. And look on the bright side—at least he didn’t take you to a theatre restaurant.

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