Dear Agony Uncle,

I agreed to receive a friend’s mail while she lives the highlife on a super yacht off the coast of Antigua. While I respect her privacy, I’ve noticed that letters have arrived from debt collection agencies. I’ve tried to contact and inform her but she hasn’t replied to my e-mail. Am I within my rights to open them?

Ginger, Sheffield

Dear Ginger,

While it sounds like your friend is living out my New Year’s Resolution of sipping champagne on a yacht, it also appears that Antiguan internet access leaves a lot to be desired. It’s very kind of you to act as your friend’s forwarding service, but when it turns into the prospect of a physical threat, it’s a totally different story.

Just imagine returning home one day to discover a burly man with a baseball bat in your living room, then finding yourself without a television and kneecaps. Not cool. It’s not as though you’re guarding anything interesting like a stash of diamonds or narcotics that would at least make a stand-off worthwhile, just a bunch of letters and a spattering of snail droppings. Also not cool.

Obviously you don’t want to get your friend in the proverbial, so make one last ditched attempt to contact her and advise her of your course of action.If you haven’t heard back within a fortnight, it’s perfectly acceptable to open one letter from each collection agency and inform them of the situation—that they shouldn’t expect to receive anything unless they strap on some flippers and swim to Antigua themselves!

I do believe there’s more for you to read: