I’m not a big fan of leggings. They’re only a dernier or two away from tights and as we all know: tights are not pants. I know leggings can be attractive when the skirt is just too short and your pegs are looking a bit pale and dare I say, hirsute? Now, sweetheart, maybe instead you should think about a nice pantyho. Or just get a wax. Do I digress?
Back to leggings. Experts are now saying they might actually be causing you to be fat, not just covering up your corpulence. Which experts? Well, expert ones. I don’t know who they are but aren’t they alarming? And dare you take the risk that they’re not expert? Apparently, while leggings are holding in your thigh muscles, bottom and stomach, they are doing the work your muscles should be doing. And flab me if the muscles don’t switch off and get a bit loose. Be very, very afraid.
So next time you reach for those leggings, why not go for a jog instead? Darn it, Black Milk is gorgeous. How could they do you any wrong? You need these zebra leggings. What would experts know anyway?
Leggings pictured available from ASOS.
Tess
1 year ago
Yes, you did digress. You stepped into very dangerous territory there with those sentences regarding “pantyho” and “waxing”.
Esmerelda Clark
1 year ago
Oh Tess, how lovely to get your feedback. You are right of course: pantyho and waxing are not for everyone. I hope you have a very smooth or hairy day, highly covered with stockings or not, whichever you prefer. I am sending you a mental martini. x